Serendipitous

Earlier this evening, I was getting ready to go out and was in the shower and my power went out. Thankfully I had less than hour before I was to leave and was sure it would be back on before I got home. I mean, my neighbors are old ladies; I knew that they weren't going to let this go on all night.

But when I came back nearly 4 hours later, it still wasn't on when I pulled in. There was no lights on inside and none of the parking lot lights were on. But as I was walking up the stairs, struggling to find my apartment key, the lights went on. Perfect timing, huh?

But, my question is this: is the food in my fridge bad? It didn't feel hot inside and the beer I pulled out to drink wasn't warm at all. It wasn't freezing cold, but it was drinkable. I am not sure. I do know I have a lot of good food in my fridge. I hope it isn't bad.

Fish...Yay or Nay?

Did you know that some male fish are taking on female characteristics due to water pollution? Weird, and kind of gross. A couple of weeks ago I wanted to go swimming in a lake, but I think I am ok not doing that. In my head it goes like this: I go for a lovely afternoon swim and I come out and all of a sudden I care way too much about sports. And I can't pick up after myself (I admit here, I am stating stereotypes). Or worse, I come out of the lake with a penis.

You want to know what are awesome. Japanese bread crumbs. They are kind of like the breading used on coconut shrimp. You want to know what sounds awesome. Coconut shrimp. I wonder if I should place an order at Red Lobster.

Wait a minute…should I get shrimp? What if the males have female characteristics? Is it ok to eat hermaphrodite shrimp? Do shrimp have a sex?

Damn my inquisitive nature.

Who Knew?

Apparently every sport has its own dangers.

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20043882,00.html

Weekend

I'm tired and my body hurts. I feel like I need a weekend to recover from my weekend. I think instead of going to the gym, I am going to go home straight away after work and lay around for the rest of the evening. I should probably go to the grocery store, but I don't want to do that either. A smoothie sounds good. Maybe I will get one of those on my way home.

I had a golf lesson yesterday, hence my body hurting. It was awesome though. The couple of tips he gave me helped immensely. I was hitting the ball straight AND far. Hooray.

I fell out of bed yesterday morning. I rolled over to get out of bed, but I was too close to the edge and just rolled out and onto the floor. I don't remember ever falling out of bed before. Although it is funny in hind site, it is kind of jarring first thing in the morning.

Saturday I was almost run over by a stroller while I was at an art fair. And the woman said, "Wow, I got really close." Not, "sorry" or "excuse me." "Wow, I got really close." Like she was trying to hit me; like I was two points or something. And the people I was with said it did look like she was aiming for me. I hate mothers and strollers. I want to yell, "You are not entitled; people should not bow down to you because you have given birth." I mean really, millions of women give birth every day. It's not that special. I have not given birth, I think that sounds more special.

Oh and speaking of kids and mothers and the art fair. I went to the bathroom and this little boy had pooped his pants. He asked his mother if he was going to have to go the shed. The mother looked mortified and said that he just shouldn't poop his pants. I mean, I know kids say the "darndest things," but you have to wonder about a little boy who is afraid he has to go to a shed for punishment.

See what I mean about needing a weekend for me weekend?

Post Cards

This is going to be a very good year for postcards for me. Norman has already sent me around 10 (I don't know the exact number off the top of my head) detailing her trip to the Bay Area of California. Laura is (or had better) send me one from Hawaii. And Jeannie said she would send me one from Ireland.

I should put together a coffee table book of all the postcards I have received. I have a lot.

Would you all buy a coffee table book of all the postcards I have ever received?

It's Father's Day

I got my dad a pumpkin plant. I figure, he plants lots of weird things, why not try a pumpkin. And because I love pumpkin flavored things and I thought he would think it is funny. I'll let you know how it goes.

Oh and I making a blackberry cobbler. I've never made a blackberry cobbler before. I'll let you know how that goes too.

Speaking of dad's, my dad in particular, the other day I went over to my parent's house and my dad had got me a new golf bag. How sweet is that?

The same day I went to my parents house, I went back to a yoga class I went to religiously last summer. I don't know if you remember, but this was the class that I loved, but the woman sometimes had us do partner poses, which I really, really did not love. So after nearly nine months of not going, I go, and she has us do partner poses. Or at least the other people did. I high-tailed it out of there.

I went for my first bike ride of the year yesterday and my ass hurts today.

I am most certainly turning a golden brown. I attended the Jazz Fest yesterday and it was hot and sunny. And fun. And I am the perfect shade to show for it.

I have one last thought for you, and it comes courtesy of a Snapple cap:

"A rainbow can only be seen in the morning or late afternoon."

Interesting, n'est pas?

Enjoy your Sunday's with your dads y'all.

In Eight Weeks...

I lost

• 4 lbs.
  
• 4.6% body fat
  
• 9 inches

He-yeah!

I did gain a half an inch in each of my arms, but I was told to think of it as gaining strength.

Seriously, check out how freakishly big my tricep looks while Laura and I try to shut this shark's mouth:

Bad News

I just heard on the news that farmers in Mexico are burning their blue agave fields so they can grow corn to meet the US's growing demand for ethanol. You all know what blue agave makes right? Tequila. So all you margarita lovers might want to stock up with a few extra bottles while you can so you can enjoy your favorite drinks when you want them.

My Parking Lot is Weird

Last night, there was a car in my parking lot. It was a white Thunderbird, but an older Thunderbird, from like, 1980's. All of a sudden it starts blaring, "You've Lost That Loving Feeling," but not the classic rendition by (I believe) The Righteous Brothers, but the cheesy 80's version by Hall and Oats. And this guy in the white Thunderbird had his door open and his leg propped up against it and all of a sudden starts singing along with it; really jamming out. I watched, first from inside my apartment, but then I needed to get closer, I needed to see this guy stuck in 1980's. He had frosted blond highlights.

You know how there was the movie, ET and then there was the cheaper, not as good alien movie, Mac and Me around the same time? I thought I was watching the Mac and Me version of Top Gun or something.

In other news, my tagline for the company I work for, "Bring Down the Curtain," was trademarked. I don't know if it is actually that important to be the author of a trademarked phrase, but it feels kind of exciting. Can I list it on my resume? How do I do that?

I Forget

Last week I told you how I forgot to set up my coffee. Well that was just the first in a line of forgetfulness. One day I forgot to set my coffee again, but I noticed in enough time to let it brew. One day I forgot to bring my bottle of water, which was really awful because I like to drink water and a lot of it, and our office is next to a waste management plant and I don't really like to drink the water there. It, for obvious reasons, tastes funny. I've also forgotten miscellaneous office things, which are too boring to list, so I've been leaving myself post-it notes everywhere and writing on my hand. Currently, my hand says "Rent" which is reminding me to pay it today. My kitchen has a note that says "Call Ashley and go to library." And my desk has a note telling me to print something, which reminded me that I needed to print something, so did that post-it note fail?

I saw "Knocked Up." It was hilarious, I highly recommend it. Tonight I am going to see a movie called "Waitress." Last Friday I saw the third "Pirates" movie. Three movies in one week; I'm getting a little movie crazy. Speaking of movies, I did not realize that the next Harry Potter movie is coming out this summer (July 11 to be exact). I didn't think it was coming out until the fall. July is definitely going to be Harry Potter month. I can't wait.

My mom has to get knee replacement surgery. Apparently she will not be getting a baboon's knee which I thought would've been cool, but some sort of porceline or something. And then pretty much right after my mom is healed, my dad has to get a hip replacement (maybe he'll get a baboon's hip). All of these replacements are due to arthritis. It appears to me that getting old sucks. I am going to enjoy being young for as long as I can. And you all should too.


Have a good, young weekend